From Beneath The Shadow of the Statue: LOST Season Finale - Reviewed!

Wow, so much to talk about, as for the film and TV fan, May is always exciting. Even as the big television series are upping the ante with their season finales, the summer movie season is kicking off with the first of the season's big blockbusters dropping into theaters. And that brings me to ...


LOST - Season Finale Review:


Tonight though was essentially television's version of a summer blockbuster: the much-anticipated, sure-to-be-controversial season finale of LOST. If you think about it, tonight's episode HAD to be huge. Because next season is the series' last, tonight was, in turn, Lost's LAST chance to deliver one of its trademark season-ending game-changers. Not only that, but this has been an interesting season of Lost in that it's been consistently good from the get-go ... and yet, there's been that feeling of anticipation that SOMETHING ... something REALLY big had to happen to put a definitive exclamation point on the year. Lost has been jabbing at us throughout the season, now it was time for Lost to deliver a knockout punch.

So, did it?

I think that, in many ways, tonight's LOST was huge. Epic. In many ways, some literal, it was downright biblical. As always, the tension from moment to moment was simply off the charts. No other show keeps you on the edge of your seat, hanging on every word, every image, like Lost. And by the way, a huge shout-out to the music - gotta love the "adventure" theme - this show has a better score than most blockbuster films. In any case, the pacing of this episode was spot-on. While you can criticize Lost at times for its bigger-picture storytelling issues, on an episode-by-episode basis, no show is better at grabbing you and pulling you into its world.

To me, the highlight of tonight's season finale was clearly the introduction of Jacob, as well as his rival / counterpart. What I loved about the entire Jacob thread was that we got an amazingly textured plotline that brilliantly fills in a lot of the gaps we've been wondering about, while at the same time setting up a number of intriguing new mysteries. But what's great here is that, whereas in the past, Lost has frustrated with its tendency to pose questions just for the hell of it, tonight's ep, as has been par for the course this season, slowly but surely put the puzzle pieces into place. Even if we are left with a lot of questions about Jacob, this episode also gave us a lot to work with in terms of what was hinted at or implied. As this episode is discussed throughout the summer, I don't think us fans will have to resort to wild guesses or crazy theories as in previous seasons. This time, the ever-elusive answers seem to be staring us in the face, if only we know where to look.

Going back to the very beginning of the ep for a second though -- wow, what an intro. The introduction of Jacob, debating philosophy with his counterpart (let's call him Esau), was a fascinating and stage-setting way with which to kick off the finale. As the fabled Black Rock approaches the island, we get a sense from Jacob and Esau of the way the game works. We see that there seems to be a basic and long-standing conflict between the the two with regards to human nature. For all we know, it's a cyclical argument that is played out over and over. And more than likely, the Lostees (and all the others (and Others?)) who have found themselves on the island have been pawns of sorts in their struggle. And, we find out, perhaps most intriguingly, that Esau would love to kill Jacob, if only he could find the proper "loophole" by which to do so.

Man, so many parallels and allusions. The biblical story of Jacob and Esau, in which Jacob stole his elder brother's birthright, leading to an ongoing war between the brothers (would this make Locke - Joseph? Hmmm ...). How about THE STAND by Stephen King - the apocalyptic struggle between good and evil? One thing Lost always does well is to draw on so many sources - literary, biblical, mythological, that you can't help but analyze the hell out of the plotlines in the interest of finding the key to it all in some biblical passage or Stephen King novel or episode of The Twilight Zone.

You have to wonder though -- are Jacob and let's-call-him-Esau LITERALLY the biblical characters, or simply analogs?

Are Esau and The Smoke Monster one and the same? If so, it'd make perfect sense. If they are separate, then surely they are in collusion. Why else would Smokey tell Ben to follow every word that Not-Locke uttered? In fact, as many speculated over the last few weeks (myself included), it seems probable that all of the "dead" people who have shown up are merely "avatars" of sorts - forms taken by Smokey (aka Esau?) to manipulate the Lostees. In any case, it makes sense that this has NOT been the real Locke. And who knows, maybe Esau / Smokey have been manipulating Ben Linus for a lot longer than we think. Maybe some of the Others' orders from Jacob have in fact been from Esau?

One more theory while I'm throwing them out: At episode's end, when Ben "kills" Jacob, Jacob mentions that "they're coming." My guess? Jacob allowed himself to be killed - maybe even coerced Ben into doing it - so that the death would serve as the eventual motivation to get the Lostees back on the island. Someone (Desmond? Eloise?) will find out what happened to Jacob and make it their mission to make sure that Flight 815 crashes as intended, so that Jack and co. can prevent Jacob from being killed. For whatever reason, the "war" that's been talked about is in fact between Jacob and Esau, and the Lostees are most likely the chess pieces with which their cosmic war is being waged. How Whidmore fits into this is unclear, but perhaps he and Ben are essentially the proxys to Jacob and Esau.

Suffice it to say, the mythological aspects of this episode were fascinating. The show has always emphasized a science vs. religion, will vs. destiny dichotomy, and whereas this season showed the extreme limits of human logic and science (time travel being the sort of endgame), next season looks to throw a giant dagger into what we've seen so far, taking us from the world of science into that of the spiritual. Faraday's realization that humans are the variables in the "what happened, happened" argument was the start of the unravelling.

Now ... all that is well and good, but there was also the human component of this episode. And that, to me, is where things faltered a bit. The bigger-picture stuff is great, but at the same time, we have to look at WHY these characters are making their decisions. WHY, for example, would Jack risk so much to essentially restart his life pre-Island. WHY would everyone else - Kate, Sawyer, Juliette, Hurley, Sayid, and Miles ultimately decide to go along with his plan?

Unfortunately, the episode either ran out of time or simply chose not to adequately address this. I never bought that Jack would be so sure that he had to detonate the bomb. When he ultimately gave his failed relationship with Kate as personal justification, I couldn't help but groan a bit. In fact, Sawyer was 100% JUSTIFIED in kicking Jack's self-righteous ass. I mean, Jack is seriously going to alter the course of human history just so he doesn't have to endure a little heartache? I'm sorry, but that is just plain LAME. And again, why did Juliette "change her mind" and ultimately side with Jack? Because she couldn't bear the thought of loving and losing Sawyer? Um ... what? And finally - Kate? HURLEY? Why would Kate go from doing everything in her power to avert Jack's plan and then five minutes later give him her blessing? Why would a Hurley or Miles stand around and do nothing as Jack threatened to erase them out of existence? To me, this was easily the weakest part of the episode. The character motivations just were not there, and when they were, the writers quickly had the likes of Sawyer, Juliette, and Kate flip-flop for very unconvincing reasons. The plus side was that we at least got some great moments of drama out of all this: a kickass smackdown between Jack and Sawyer, some great gun-battles with lots of Dharma Initiative destruction, and a chaotic and action-packed ending that led to the big moment of the night ...

... that being Juliette's dramatic and tragic death. Now, for the record, I predicted Juliette would bite the big one. To me, the character had run her course, and her death was needed in order to darken Sawyer and once again make him the lone wolf of old. And hey, at least it was true to Juliette's character that she had ambiguous motives (and that damn half-smile / smirk) right up until the end. She essentially got the last laugh too. Originally, she got Sawyer off the sub so that they could STOP Jack from detonating the bomb. But perhaps the thought of her being dead, leaving Sawyer to run off with Freckles was too much for her to bear. Only fitting that her final act was one giant "F-You" - so long, reality. Enter: the bright white light of oblivion, baby.

I guess what it boils down to though is that this ep had SO MUCH going on - so many big moments, so much new information to process, that it's very, very tempting to overlook the rushed characterization and glossed-over logic. I mean, Miles even sort of poked fun at this when he sarcastically remarked that Jack's plan was *very* well thought-out (for all they knew, the bomb could itself be the source of the very "incident" that Jack was trying to prevent - good call, Miles!). But there was a Rose and Bernard (and Vincent!) appearance. There was the STATUE in all its Egyptian-god glory (as fans rushed to Wikipedia to look up Sobek and any other lizard god from Egyptian lore ...). There was the awesome acting of Michael Emerson as Ben - his final speech to Jacob was a kickass Lost moment for the ages, as was his Psycho-style stab-stab-stabbing of The Big J. There was our ol' pal Lapidus, tagging along with Ilana and the Shadow Conspiracy, who happen to be carrying the body of one John Locke! (So ... WHO are they, exactly?) There was that awesome music! And yeah, like everyone else, I'll probably be theorizing from now until January on Jacob, Esau, The Smoke Monster, Not-Locke, etc. I mean, wow, I guess my eight years of Jewish day school as a kid have finally paid off - I now get all the biblical allusions on LOST. Dammit all ... But ... I guess in a weird way this has been the LOST experience all along. You get caught up in the bigger picture. You get annoyed with the logic leaps and the ambiguity and all that, but man, when that title logo thumps onto the screen you're in like Flynn. I still don't see why anyone would be pro-Jack in this ep. But even so, hot damn, I can't wait to see what happens next.

My Grade: A-

Stay tuned for: FRINGE, PRISON BREAK, and STAR TREK - Reviewed!

THE PENULTIMATE 24: Dammit ...?!?!

TWENTY-BY-GUM-FOUR Review:

- Ugh. We were on our way to getting a pretty damn good episode of 24 tonight ... there was an intense search for the soon-to-detonate bio-weapon, EVIL TONY was captured by Jack, and that uber-beyotch Olivia was well on her way to getting vice-gripped by the righteous hand of justice, aka AARON PIERCE. Everything was going pretty well, and there was GRAVITAS a-plenty. We even had a thunderous NOD OF GRAVITAS between Jack and his Muslim cleric friend, as the two exchanged psychic waves on a plane of existence that most of us can only dream of. Even the banter between Chloe and Janeane Garafalo was semi-amusing and provided some much-needed levity in the midst of all the grim n' grittiness.

BUT ... we should have known that KIM and AWESOME STORYLINES rarely mix. I wanted to believe that Kim would be woven back into the action in a fun and exciting manner, but instead the writers resorted to "24 Cliche #537": One of our heroes is blackmailed by the badguys and must betray everyone and everything they hold dear in order to save the life of a friend or loved one. ARRRRRRRRRGH. Not only have we already seen this IN THIS VERY SEASON, but it's been done multiple times in the show's history, and the tropes are so familiar by this point that a 24 fan can practically recite them by heart.

Now, who knows, maybe there will be some great twist in next week's finale that will put a new spin on a familiar situation. But who cares - it made for a groan-inducing cliffhanger tonight. The 24 team should be smart enough at this point to subvert the show's conventions. How great would it have been for Jack to have anticipated this villainy and worked out some kind of contingency plan? Or what if Jack simply said "screw it" and decided that, with only hours left to live, he'd throw caution to the wind and somehow try to save his daughter, danger be damned. But are we really going to spend half of next week's season finale going through the motions of seeing Jack go rogue and take on the FBI, so that he can appear to have betrayed his country for the 500th time this season? And it doesn't take a psychic to see where this is headed - Jack will save his daughter, will be on the verge of death, and in his last moments the FBI will experiment with their newfangled medical procedure and use Kim's blood to help revive Jack. Ugh. Where's the twist? Where's the climactic showdown? Dammit all, where's the gravitas?

This episode of 24 simply dropped the ball. It took the emotional core of this season, Jack vs. Tony, and blew it off with barely any fanfare or drama. We STILL don't really have a good explanation for Tony's actions, so it's hard to even hate him all that much or to truly buy him as a legit villain. But here, within minutes, Jack cornered him, captured him, choked him out, and, well ... that was pretty much it. Even if Tony escapes and we have one final epic battle royale between the two, well, the air has already been let out of the balloon, so to speak. I just think it's disappointing that, for a while there, 24 was telling a very logical story about Private Military Corporations and disillusionment with one's country, and now we are left with something of a cluster as we head into the finale. And it feels like it's a mish-mash of every 24 cliche - Kim in Danger, Jack having to go rogue under duress, a scheming relative in the White House, a friend-gone-bad, Jack at the end of his rope / life, some vague conspiracy that was built up for weeks only to (as usual) disappear into the ether by season's end, etc.

Dammit 24, get your $#%^ together for the finale, or I'm going to need MORE CC's!

My Grade:

Most of the Episode: B+
Ending: C-

Must-See TV? OFFICE and 30 ROCK in Review

Friday, what? After a looong week it's time to kick back, relax, and enjoy a couple of days of blissful freedom. Bring on the weekend, baby.

Let's kick things off with some TV Reviews, shall we?

- THE OFFICE had a really strange, yet really enjoyable episode last night. The first half of the ep was pretty conventional, with Michael upset that no one from the office wanted to have lunch with him, and convinced that the reason why was that everyone was used to the old management and had forgotten how to cut loose at work. In a response that only Michael Scott would dream up, Scranton's returning branch manager turns the old offices of the Michael Scott paper company into a "cafe disco" - basically an empty room with an expresso machine and a stereo. Michael tries and fails to turn the space into the site of an impromtu dance party. Of course, as soon as Michael gives up on the idea, the Dunder Mifflin staff start to get into it, and soon enough there's a full-n dance party going on at work. In this way, the second half of the episode was pretty uncoventional - a continuous look at the ensuing dance party, complete with an ongoing soundtrack in the background. There was something that was just kind of awesome about this whole sequence -- it was fun, upbeat, but also with moments of hilarity - Andy and Kelly's over-the-top dance-off, Kevin making out with the woman he met several episodes back, and Angela reluctantly tapping her toes to the music, much to Michael's delight. The other big standout in this ep was new receptionist Erin - she hasn't had much screentime so far, but her mix of enthusiasm and quirkiness was a nice addition to the mix this episode. There is definitely some potential there. Other parts of this episode were interesting but didn't work quite as well as the main A-plot. Dwight treating Phyliss' bad back as if she were a race horse was a strange mix of awkwardly funny and just plain uncomfortable. I wasn't sure if they were going to fight or make out - luckily, neither happened. Also, Jim and Pam's decision to elope, followed by a mutual agreement to hold off and have a proper wedding ... well, it was intriguing but felt a tad bit glossed over. It's not that I thought it needed more screen time, per se, just that it was hard to tell what changed their minds, exactly. But overall, this was a really fun, even uplifting episode of The Office that, to me, continued the show's streak of A-quality episodes that has gone on now for several weeks. Not only was this another great ep, but it really felt different in tone and structure from any episode we've seen before - I give the show a ton of credit in that regard for mixing things up to such an extent. And finally, how funny was Michael mouthing the words to "Everybody Dance Now"? Just the look on his face was hilarious.

My Grade: A-


- As for 30 ROCK ... this was yet another episode that had some hilarious moments but just left me feeling slightly disappointed when all was said and done. Keep in mind, I only say this because at this time last year 30 ROCK was absolutely killing it - every episode was firing on all cylinders, with jokes so densely-packed into the script that you had to stop yourself from laughing just so you could hear the next incredible line of dialogue. 30 Rock still has several great quotables every week ... but I can't help but feel like there is an increasing disconnect between the humor and the plotlines. Before, the jokes felt totally organic because they basically were baked into the plot. Now, it seems like the plotlines are becoming more and more sitcom-y, and only after the fact do the writers throw us some bones and insert a vintage Tracy Jordan non sequitar or a classic Alec Baldwin word of wisdom. Last night's ep was another movie-centric plot (and a Universal movie to boot) in which Jack pulled a "Mama Mia" and went in search of his estranged dad. Turns out that Alan Alda, playing a liberal professor, is the baby-daddy. Meanwhile, Tracy has been reunited with his own illegitimate love-child, who is suspiciously old and arouses suspicion that he may be scamming an oblivious Tracy. The twist (twist!) is that Tracy knows he's being scammed, but just likes having his money go to his "son's" projects, which turn out to actually be worthwhile. Both plotlines had their moments, and Tracy got in some vintage hilarious lines. But an "okay" episode of 30 Rock is definitely a step down for a show that has so consistently delivered comedic greatness. Step it up, Tina!

My Grade: B


- Alright - short entry today, stay tuned for a STAR TREK review.

Follow the Leader: LOST thoughts + Fringe and Prison Break

First of all, congrats to the Celtics on a dominating win last night over the Magic. It was a must-win game and Boston came through big-time, with stellar performances from guys like Eddie House and Rajon Rondo - two players who have really stepped it up and proven themselves as invaluable to the Celtics team. It's going to be an interesting series, but after last night I feel like Boston is in good position to pull it out.

TV STUFF:


- On last night's LOST: Well, there was a lot to like about the episode - from Hurley's hilarious inability to pretend he *wasn't* from the future, to Ben Linus' classic reaction shots when he realizes that he is no longer in control of things. Overall, there is a great sense of momentum going into next week's double-length finale, and I definitely anticipate we are in for one roller-coaster ride of an event in one week's time. I also can't deny that last night's Lost built off of the previous week's sense of intrigue. When I sat down to watch Lost last night, I was still buzzing from last week's time-loop craziness involving Eloise Hawkings and Daniel Faraday, and contemplating all of the potential implications of Eloise's shocking shooting of her own son (which as of this episode - I think? - has the added twist of her having been pregnant (!) with Daniel at the time!). And I'll give it up for this episode - the talk of undoing the past and re-writing the future provides endless fodder for discussion and debate.

But where this episode lost me a bit (pun intended) was in Jack's reasoning for detonating an H-Bomb in order to set off some kind of chain reaction that *might* irreversibly change the future such that Flight 815 never crash-lands on the island and lands safely in Los Angeles. I mean, sure, Jack has been unstable and on-edge ever since he left the island way back when ... but, his current plan seems completely crazy. For one - who wants to erase years of their lives, wiping out relationships, maturity, etc? Second, even if Jack himself wanted to go through with it, he would essentially be playing god and forcing Kate, not to mention Rose, Bernard, et all to lose moments that they probably don't want to lose. To me, Kate was clearly justified in ditching Jack - not only would his plan potentially rob her of memories she doesn't want to lose (ie Aaron), but it would put untold lives in peril. Plus, who knows if it would even work? Faraday told Jack that people are variables, but prior to that he insisted that "what happened, happened." Most evidence we've seen so far points to the latter being true.

Again, it's fun to debate all this stuff, but at the same time, you'd think the show might address some of these issues. As is, this ep was vintage Lost in that Jack stated his position, Kate stated hers, and the two said barely anything else. Kate never said "Jack, your plan is insane because of x y and z," and Jack never said "Kate, we have to do this because of x". I'm not saying the show needs to be one giant exposition-fest, but I also don't like when character motications and logic are so murky. Same goes for Locke's big cliffhanger statement about going to kill Jacob. Um, what? What does that even mean? Sure, it *sounds* cool - "kill Jacob? wha? huh? but who? but how?". But it's basically an empty statement as far as we're concerned. Very Grant Morrison-esque - throw out a cool-sounding concept with the hopes that the idea of it alone will blow our minds.

Anyways, it's semi-hard to judge this episode, because next week's payoff might be so awesome that, in retrospect, the build-up turns out to be perfect. At the same time, what happened happened, and what happened with this episode was that there was some questionable characterization that made me say "huh?".

My Grade: B


- I also watched Tuesday's episode of FRINGE last night, and, whoah boy, this show is getting good. Whereas Lost sometimes makes me feel like the writers just splashed some paint on a canvas and said "here, look what I made!", Fringe has been doing something pretty cool: telling and old-fashioned, by-god *story*. Yep, the awesome thing about Fringe is that literally every episode from the pilot to now has seamlessly fit into the larger tapestry. There's no questions about continuity, no contradictory plot points, no sense that the show is just throwing crap against the wall. Fringe has quietly gone about crafting one hell of a mythology. At the same time, each episode has a nice element of self-contained craftsmanship. In some ways, it's a reliable workhorse - in every ep we know we'll get a cool fringe-science case, learn about some cool pseudo-science theory, get a couple of hilarious Walter-isms, etc. But at the same time, and I don't think it's fully surfaced until now, there's been an awesome web of alternate realities, mysterious observers, secret drug trials, and shady corporations that's been weaved in the background, and at times in the foreground. Suffice it to say, I was very impressed this week to see that practically *everything* that's happened on the show to date artfully fits into the bigger picture. And man, they have no set things into motion for one barnburner of a season finale. Meanwhile, I was absolutely wowed by Jon Noble as Walter in this ep. His breakdown at episode's end after Olivia confronts him about the drug trials he helped facilitate, of which she was a part, was intense, sad, and disturbing all at once. If Noble does not win an Emmy for this role, there is no TV god. Furthermore, the interplay between the characters has been honed to the point where it's truly enjoyable to watch them interact. It's amazing how Anna Torv has made Agent Dunham into one of TV's best characters in such a short time - especially after most wrote her off as bland and stiff in the early days of the show. I still think they overdo it with Peter questioning his father's theories all the time, but even Peter has had a lot of nice character advancement since the pilot. But really, this show is just plain kicking ass of late. The whole ZFT / alternate realities arc is just plain cool-as-hell, and I can't wait to see where things go from here.

My Grade: A


- Finally, I do want to talk about PRISON BREAK from Friday. I thought last week's ep picked up some substantial momentum as compared to the week before that, and this week's ep again built on that. Everything just seemed amped up - we got a truly vile and villainous T-Bag, some vintage Mahone craziness, and a great, very evil turn from Michael's mom. Up until now, she's been kind of a generic schemer, but in this ep we finally saw that she was an adversary worthy of the Scofield name - conniving, manipulative, and as easy to hate as Michael is to root for. There was also the big Lincoln-is-not-Michael's-brother revelation, which sort of came out of nowhere but at least was a semi-interesting twist (so is THAT why they have different last names? hmmm ...). But yeah, the ep was fast-paced and enjoyable, and my hope is that, again, it all makes for an awesome finale. I really hope the whole Company storyline is wrapped up ASAP, so that we can get a final episode that feels more like vintage PB. In the interim, it's good to know that the show has, at the least, upped its game since its somewhat limp return a few weeks back.

My Grade: B+



- Aaaaaand I'm out. Check back soon for the latest.

Adamantium-Infused: WOLVERINE Review and MORE!

And then it was the summer movie season ...

While this summer boasts no sure-thing fanboy juggernaut on par with last summer's Iron Man or Dark Knight, there are still the usual bigtime tentpoles that will be vying for your hard-earned dollars. Personally, I can't help but feel that there are some big, big question marks around many of the summer's biggest movies. We already saw the first misfire of the summer with Wolverine -- sure, the movie made bank, but creatively, well, it didn't exactly raise the bar. Star Trek *was* a big unknown, but the onslaught of glowing reviews has pretty much convinced me that it won't disappoint. That said, a movie like Terminator: Salvation could still go either way -- I mean, who isn't salivating at the thought of finally seeing an adult John Connor fighting evil robot armies in the future? But -- McG as a bigtime action director is still a pretty unproven commodity. I remain somewhat optimistic, but still, you never know. Really, the only 100% sure-thing this summer is UP. Pixar can basically do no wrong, and as much as I loved Wall-E, I get the sense that UP might be even better. I love the fact that we know so little about the movie, too. Pixar has earned the right to play coy - I can't wait to see what they have up their sleeve.

On the other hand, I think we've had a very above-average winter and spring at the movies. There were some truly great comedies like Observe and Report, Adventureland, and Fanboys, and some badass action flicks like Taken and, of course, Watchmen. There was even Anvil: The Story of Anvil, which may well end up as the documentary of the year. Usually, it's rare for movies from January to April to end up on my Year-End Best-Of list, but I could definitely see it happening in a couple of cases in '09.

Anyways, let's talk Wolverine ...


X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE Review:

- Okay, first off, let me reitirate my position on the X-Men movies. I thought Part 1 was okay - it got a lot of the fundamentals right, but never really captured the colorful and over-the-top nature of the comics or cartoons. I never really loved the "realistic" approach that Bryan Singer took, and it was clear that Singer never really got the more comic-bookish elements of the franchise. Halle Berry as Storm was a joke, and some of the other casting was equally bland. The real stroke of genius was the twin casting of Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellan - the sheer awesomeness of those two helped to elevate the franchise far beyond what it might have been otherwise. Don't get me wrong - Singer had a great eye for updating some of the classic characters and for the interpersonal drama that was part and parcel with the X-Men. But he never really seemed to be having fun with it - all the little things that made the X-Men cool - from the flashy costumes to Wolverine's berzerker rage, seemed cleaned up and toned down. X2 was a big improvement. It kept the great character moments from Part 1 and upped the ante in terms of scope and action. X2 still stands as one of the better superhero movies ever made. Now, X3 gets a ton of crap from fans, but to me it wasn't much different from the previous two movies. In fact, I actually enjoyed the film's focus on action and superheroics. Sure, it was a letdown for those hoping for a faithful adaptation of The Dark Phoenix Saga, but come on, who ever thought that that would happen? So to me, X3 remains one of the most perpetually underrated movies by comic geeks. Not because I think it's the end all be all, but just because I think it's about on-par with the previous two movies, and is in some ways even more entertaining. I guess I preface with this because to me, the argument of which is better: X3 or Wolverine? - is easy to answer - X3 all the way. X3 had several moments that were undeniably cool - Kitty Pryde outrunning the Juggernaut, Logan confronting the Phoenix power even as it tore him to shreds ... Wolverine ... was seriously short on moments of awesomeness.

Focusing back in on WOLVERINE ... To me, I've never been fully happy with Hugh Jackman in the role. I like Jackman as an actor, and he's been excellent in a number of movies. I just think it's too bad that Wolverine had to be played by such a leading-man type actor. I would have liked to see Wolverine as a true badass - a Clint Eastwood or Jack Nicholson type. Someone who's gritty, dirty, ugly - someone who you don't want to mess with. Hugh Jackman is a charismatic and talented actor, but he doesn't really fit that mold.

Still, whatever ... if Wolverine as a movie rocked, I could easily get over any reservations I might have about Jackman. But the fact is, Wolverine is just sort of there. It feels thrown together, with a plot that barely makes sense and a lot of scenes that seem to have been included for a supposed cool-factor and little else. Not only that, but the movie has an inherently uphill battle in that it insists on focusing on Wolverine's origin ... when the whole point of the character is that he is a mysterious lone wolf. Sure, the comics eventually caved and gave Logan a fleshed-out origin, and some of that is adapted in the movie ... but really, it is not a story that needed to be told. Especially given that, here, we get all kinds of self-reflective Wolverine. This isn't Batman, dude. Wolverine isn't a character with a lot of inner turmoil, he's an animalistic ass-kicking machine. But, again, the comics at least gave us a damn good story when Marvel chose to do the origin -- the movie gives us random scenes set in the past that mostly amount to jack squat. We see a young James Howlett (aka Logan) accidentally kill his own father. We see Logan and Victor Creed, his half brother (aka Sabretooth) randomly fight together in every major American war (guess he's not Canadian anymore?), just because, hey, why not?

Later, the movie flashes to Wolverine's time as some kind of special ops recruit for the government-sponsored Team X, a pre-X-Men team of mutants that do all kinds of morally-gray black ops type stuff. On this team is Logan, Victor, Wade Wilson (Deadpool), and a couple of other lesser-known guys with names like Agent Zero. Ryan Reynolds as Wilson is an instant standout - at first, his wise-cracking demeanor and kickass sword-wielding skills seem right out of the comics. It only makes sense then that the character in this form has about 10 minutes of screentime, before becoming a hideous mutant uber-villain who can't speak and inexplicably has the power of EVERY OTHER mutant in the movie, plus ... he can grow giant swords from his hands. Say what now? Hmm, so apparently this movie was written by your third-grade cousin.

In fact, the selection of characters in this movie seems completely random. I mean, hey, you know who'd be call in a Wolverine Origin movie? GAMBIT! Why is Gambit in this movie? What narrative purpose does he serve? I have no idea. He has approximately ONE SCENE of vintage Rajun' Cajun' card-throwin' coolness, but is otherwise pretty much a waste. Yes, I geeked out like everyone else when Gambit hurled some kinetic energy-infused playing cards. But yeah, his character is emblematic of what's wrong with this movie - there's no rhyme or reason behind everything - it's just "let's throw a bunch of randomness at the movie screen and see what sticks." A cameo by Patrick Stewart as Professor X, for example, could have been cool but is ultimately a throwaway. The inclusion of younger versions of iconic X-Men like Cyclops feels like overkill. The Blob? Meh.

And would it have killed them to have Gambit sport his trademark tan trenchcoat? Couldn't have Deadpool donned his awesome red and black mask from the comics? Why use these characters if you take all the fun out of them?

I will give some props though - Jackman does put in a good effort with what he's given to work with. The other real standout though is Liev Schreiber as Sabretooth. Now, keep in mind, Victor Creed here is nothing like his comic book counterpart, and nothing like Tyler Mane's version in the first X-Men movie. So that in and of itself is a bit disappointing. But ... Schreiber gives it a good go, and is clearly having a lot of fun in the role. If nothing else, he's one badass Jew.

But really, Wolverine is kind of a mess. Even the f/x tend to look somewhat haphazardly done at times, with a couple of climactic fight scenes looking very green screen-ish. Visually, the movie has no real consistent look or style - again, just kind of bland. What's more, the tone never really feels right. There are a couple of moments that feel appropriately epic and dark (ie when the adamantium is injected into Wolvie's body - pretty cool), but the movie never really gets as gritty or brutal or intense as it should. By the film's climax, you barely care what's going on or why. We all know that Wolverine is destined to lose his memories of this adventure, for example, and the moment where his mind is wiped should have been dramatic and memorable. Instead, it happens through a very goofy and contrived means (an adamantium bullet to the brain), and the impact of it all never truly hits home. If anything, the movie ends up in a strange place, in which the preceding story is rendered almost inconsequential since it seems to have little effect on what we know will come next. It's one more example of the storytelling here being sort of weak overall. I mean, even the post-credits teaser ain't exactly all that. Iron Man and Hulk had badass bonus scenes, but all we get here is either a.) Deadpool: not dead! or b.) Wolverine - at a bar in Japan! Oooh, Japan, setting of the classic Frank Miller comic book tale. Could be good setup for a sequel, right? Problem is, after this movie, you won't exactly be jonesing for a Part 2 ... the fact is, this movie seems to indicate that there isn't much gas left in the X-Men tank. If anything, I got the urge to pop in the recently-released DVD's of the awesome 90's-era cartoon series and remind myself of the days when Wolverine really did kick some ass, Bub.

My Grade: C+


- Alright, GO CELTICS and psyched for LOST. Snikt!

Gettin' Metal: ANVIL: THE STORY OF ANVIL Review - Plus: 24, Smallville, Simpsons, The Celtics, and MORE

Whoah, it's a frustrating feeling when your actual blog can't keep up with your internal one. I mean, in this day and age, who has time to write down coherant sentances and well thought-out phrases? I mean, god, I could just do the Twitter thing and bring my every waking thought to you in all of their fractured and nonsensical glory. But no my friends, I am a man of words, and I prefer overlong, long-winded ramblings to lowest-common-denominator insta-punditry any day of the week. So, suck it, Ashton Kutcher.

Anyways, um ... so, yeah ... I have a lot to talk about and have gotten WAY behind here. I've got lots of TV to talk about, ANVIL, and of course (SNIKT!) WOLVERINE. Will I fit it all in this very blog post? Let's find out, shall we?


- Before I talk about anything else, how about a big congrats to the BOSTON CELTICS for a huge Game 7 victory on Saturday over the Chicago Bulls. The epic back and forth battle will likely go down as one of the all-time great NBA playoff series, with numerous overtimes, dozens of last-second heroics, and just a great level of intensity and competition from both teams. I give it up to the Bulls - they played well and it was hard to hate them even if they nearly eliminated the C's. All I can say is, what a series.

But, no rest for the weary. Last night the Celtics quickly moved into Round 2 of the playoffs, where they faced off with the up and coming Orlando Magic. It was yet another intense game for Boston, who came back from 28 points down to nearly win the game. There were some real positive signs in the game - Boston got some better-than-expected play from players like Scallebrini and Stephon Marbury, who had some brief flashbacks to the "Starbury" of old. But Ray Allen with only 11 points is not a good thing. Allen has to be a consistent scorer if Boston hopes to win without KG. Meanwhile, it remains to be seen how well the C's can contain Dwight "Superman" Howard. The guy is simply a beast. So, last night was a tough loss for the Celtics, but ... I think we could be in for yet another close and exciting series.

And by the way, let me throw in a shout-out to the Houston Rockets, who managed to come in strong in their first game against the Lakers and, basically, whoop some ass. I've got to ask: how can anyone who isn't a die-hard Lakers fan like Kobe Bryant? Sure, you can respect his talent, but the guy is a whiny egomaniac who acts like he is destined for all these great things. All I know is, Jordan never spent a whole game complaining to the refs.


TV STUFF:

- On last night's episode of TWENTY-BY-GOD-FOUR (24): Well, I thought it was a decent episode, but I do think it was kind of filler to pave the way for next week's seemingly more action-packed installment. I mean, it was still an episode that had some particularly choice scenes - Jack's emotional confession of his deadly sickness to Chloe for example was pretty intense. And I also liked the scenes with Jonas Hodges coming to terms with his final fate. But ... I was a bit turned off by the somewhat heavy-handed insertion of racial profiling, etc. into the mix. 24 has already dealt at length with the plight of Arab-Americans in a post-9/11 world, and featured numerous storylines about unfair prejudices against Muslims, etc. Creating a new character here to fill the role of moralizing cleric seemed a bit clunky. What would have been nice instead is if the show took some time to develop Tony's true motivations, which we still don't know. Or how about giving the President a reason to be awake at 4 am other than to field one phone call after another about what the FBI's botched this time. Also, I give this season credit for avoiding the usual cheesy subplots that 24 is known for, but, that said, the whole Olivia thing is getting to that point. Within a couple of hours she decides to arrange for the assassination of Jonah Hodges, then decides she can't go through with it (though it happens anyway), and the point of all of that was, what exactly? I know that I and others tend to give 24's perpetually lame subplots a pass just because they've almost become something of a tradition on the show (and at least when it was Kim and a cougar-trap there was a fun, B-movie quality at work). But you can't help but wonder -- if we just got rid of Olivia completely, and focused more on developing the villains, the President's cabinet, etc -- would anyone be upset? In any case, next week should be sufficiently action-packed and gravitas-filled so that we don't have time to wonder why the heck Aaron Pierce is hanging around the White House as if he never left, with a bullet-wound, no sleep, and presumably no contract. Honestely though ... upon further reflection I feel like part of why this ep frustrated me a bit is that it felt like this *should* have been the ep where we really build up Jack vs. Tony. Right now, I just don't feel as hyped for the epic Sack vs. Soulpatch smackdown as I want to be. I mean, what's up with Tony anyways? Is he just a morally-gray hired gun or is he truly an evil bastard who wants to bring down Jack and America itself? If Tony is going to be a full-fledged badguy, give us a true reason to hate him other than the killing of that Larry dude from the FBI. If it's gonna be Jack vs. Tony with everything on the line, give it the epic buildup it deserves, dammit. Think of it this way -- to me, there had better be a good reason why Tony replaced the friggin' Candyman as our big bad villain. Oh well, at least we got the cheestastically awesome line where the wise Muslim guy tells Jack to forgive himself and Jack is all like "I gave up on that a long time ago." Dammit all.

My Grade: B


- I do want to mention THE SIMPSONS from Sunday. While the episode wasn't perfect, it was surely one of the best of this season to date. It benefitted from a hilarious Homer-Marge subplot that saw Homer move into a bachelor pad, causing he and Marge's relationship to randomly take on the characteristics of a twenty-something fling. Pretty funny stuff, and the main plot with Bart and Lisa attending a swanky new school in "Waverly Hills" had some great comedy as well. A couple of the jokes fell flat (Ellen Page's turn as the tween star Alaska Nebraska, for example), but overall this was a pretty memorable ep.

My Grade: B+

- FAMILY GUY had an above-average episode as well, in my opinion, at least as compared to the past couple of subpar eps. The premise, which saw Brian begin dating Lauren Conrad of The Hills fame, was pulled off pretty well, and there were a couple of pretty good cutaway gags to boot. Family Guy still has a looong way to go if it ever wants to get back to its Season 1 and 2 peak, but at least this one was something of a step in the right direction.

My Grade: B

- As for KING OF THE HILL - a decent episode that had a somewhat odd twist. Basically, it turns out that depite his lack of athletic talent, Bobby looks forward to little league every year, much to Hank's frustration. Hank would rather Bobby not play than embarrass himself out on the field. So when Bobby's new coach turns out to be big on following your dreams and believing in yourself, Hank is made to look like the badguy for being a realist when it comes to Bobby's chances of baseball success. This episode struck me as strange in that Hank, as usual, is proven "right" in that ultimately the overeager coach sets up Bobby for failure in the big game. Hank yanks Bobby off the field at the last minute, sparing him humiliation. In one respect, I give KOTH credit for being one of the only shows that would present a situation like this with this degree of subtlety and wit. On the other hand, it felt like a bit of a cop out in that Hank's actions made for a "happy" ending, when in fact they were kinda awful if you think about it. Hmm ...

My Grade: B

- SMALLVILLE last week was a fun and suspenseful episode that finally brought the neverending Davis Bloome storyline to something of a head. The ep left us still bracing for a climactic confrontation between Clark and Davis, but it did put the wheels in motion for a pretty exciting finale. That said, while this was an intense episode, you couldn't help but feel that a clot of the conflict was a bit contrived. In order to keep Clark away from Doomsday, the writers set up Chloe as sympathetic to Davis and even as an accomplice of sorts. Chloe had to make one bone-headed decision after another in order to help out Davis, and you have to wonder what her real motivation would be to cling to the side of a guy who happens to be a deranged monster. Still, Chloe's craziness did set up some good scenes between her and Oliver, who sufficiently chewed her out for her reckless actions. Again, I give Smallville credit for delivering a pretty compelling ongoing storyarc, something the show has rarely been able to do at this level. At the same time, there had damn well better be some payoff coming soon.

My Grade: B+

- For my money, THE OFFICE continues to be on a roll, while 30 ROCK slips a bit each week. The Office has seemingly found a near-perfect blend of absurdist humor and great characterization in recent weeks, mixing in hilarious quotables and sight-gags with some genuinely interesting character development. Michael Scott's solo venture as the head of the Michael Scott Paper Company was handled brilliantly overall, and it also provided a great setup for Michael's eventual return last week to Dunder Mifflin. While not quite as on-the-mark as the previous couple of weeks, Thursday's Office was yet another winner. Meanwhile, 30 Rock is consistently one of the funniest shows on TV, and every episode has 4 or 5 classic lines that are guaranteed to be quoted on Facebook status updates the next morning. BUT ... 30 Rock needs to be careful about trying to be all things to all people. The last several eps have really tried to have more emotional / dramatic storylines that would feel more at home in a traditional sitcom. Where the 30 Rock of old would have completely satirized the old sitcom tropes, the nu-30 Rock more often than not plays things straight. I mean, did we really need a genuine moment between Jack and his mother? To me that's not what the show is about - it's about being a madhouse of crazy characters and random humor. We still get some of that in each ep (thank god for Tracy Morgan, who has never played anything straight in his life), but I still worry that the show is being watered down for the masses.

My Grades:

The Office: A-
30 Rock: B


- Finally, I'm psyched for what might happen on tonight's FRINGE. Last week's ep was good stuff - I am loving the slowly-unravelling mythology of the ZFT, etc., and I love how each week if you read between the linesa bit, you can infer a little more about Walter's true role in all of this. Overall, the show is just really gelling, and managing both to tell interesting and creepy freak-of-the-week stories while also tying them into a much larger framework. Last week's ep, with a spinal-fluid-sucking succubus, was case in point. We got an X-Files style one-in-done mystery but also another piece of the larger puzzle revealed, with the revelation tht Walter Bell has a lot to do with the wave of fringe science-based mayhem that agent Dunham has been investigating. Also, congrats to Fringe on being renewed for Season 2. Considering how much the show has improved in the span of 20-odd episodes, I'm psyched to see where it goes from here.

My Grade: A-


MOVIE REVIEWS ...




ANVIL: THE STORY OF ANVIL Review:

- As the summer movie season begins with a weekly parade of overhyped blockbusters, I would urge anyone looking for something completely different to check out a movie that rocks harder than Stonehenge - ANVIL: THE STORY OF ANVIL. Many are calling the movie a real-life Spinal Tap, and those people would be right. Anvil is an absolutely hilarious documentary that looks at the journey of a past-their-prime metal band known as Anvil. Well, actually, Anvil never really even had a prime - they had a brief moment of glory in the early 80's while on tour with the likes of Bon Jovi and The Scorpions, during which they actually did gain a cult-fan-following. They also proved to be an influence on a number of bands from Metallica to Guns n' Roses, with a faster-paced, proto-speed-metal style that put a heavier, thrashier spin on the usual 80's shenanigans. And yet, despite that, Anvil fizzled out before they ever truly made it big. Lifelong friends Steve "Lips" Kudlow and the ironically-named Robb Reiner ended up retreating back to their small Canadian hometown. They took menial jobs and started families. But, all the while, Anvil never quit. They kept playing in small clubs and bars, recruited new members, and put out an amazing 14 albums on a small record label. All the while, Lips and Robb were convinced that Anvil's big moment was yet to come - they dreamt big, and even as they reached their 50's, they kept on reaching for that brass ring and they never stopped believing. They kept on rocking.

It's for this reason that Anvil is both hilarious and yet surprisingly heartfelt. You laugh at Anvil on many occasions, but you also find yourself drawn to Lips' charismatic and well-meaning personality and you really begin rooting for him to see his impossible dream to fruition. This is a true underdog story in that way - you are there with Anvil through the tragedies and triumphs, and you can't help but want to stand up and cheer when it looks like they might actually get their shot.

Again, so much of the movie is driven by the relationship between Lips and Robb. They are in many ways real-life cartoon characters - Lips is nutty and crazy and wears his heart on his sleave, whereas Robb is sullen and brooding and takes himself seriously to the point of absurdity (his gallery of paintings is absolutely hilarious - all I can say is that his art is reflective of his self-serious and somewhat oblivious personality). But the two are a classic odd couple. You laugh along with them as they have the usual rock n' roller arguments, but at the same time, you can't help but admire their brotherly relationship. The two are there for each other through thick and thin. They decided to be rockers as kids, as many kids do, and they never stopped trying for that dream.

The movie works so well in that you do get that juxtaposition of these guys who totally believe they are would-be titans of rock (and hey, maybe they are ...), with the reality that they are a couple of middle-aged Jewish guys who are to some degree stuck in the 80's and milking a fifteen minutes of fame from twenty-five years ago long past its expiration date. But there is a real sincerity to these guys that is contagious. And in an age where all kinds of lame pop acts are billed as the next big thing, you have to wonder: why aren't these guys getting a shot? They did influence the likes of Slash and Lars Ulrich after all. And once you hear their trademark tune, "Metal on Metal," you can't help but feel like, at the least, it deserves to be on every Monsters of Rock collection alongside "We're Not Gonna Take It." Perhaps a song or two on Guitar Hero?

Whatever the case may be, ANVIL: THE STORY OF ANVIL is certainly one of the must-see movies of the year so far. My one issue with it is that the doc can feel a bit contrived at times. When the band treks across LA to visit with the major record labels, for example, you have to wonder a bit how much of this was staged for the cameras. But that aside, there is a genuine passion and likability to the band that this movie completely captures. It can be sad to see these guys living out broken dreams, and at the same time hilarious to see the absurdity of their rock n' roll lifestyles that will not die. But at the same time this is an inspirational story - a real life lesson to keep the dream alive and never stop rockin'. Anvil rocks, dude.

My Grade: A-


- Alright, I'll save WOLVERINE for its own post. Until then, ROCK.

From Friday: a LOST post plus other random musings

NOTE: This post was originally written on Friday. Sorry for the publishing delay.



Wow. What a Celtics game last night, and what an incredible series it's been. I got home from Boston University's Redstone film festival last night eager to fire up the DVR and catch the fourth quarter of the game. Good thing I recorded an extra hour just in case ... as the game went into a remarkable triple overtime, after a series that has already seen multiple overtimes and multiple incredible, dramatic finishes.

Last night's finish was certainly disappointing as a Celtics fan, but still, you can't help but admire the heart that both teams showed throughout the game. It's hard to really hate the Bulls, as the current team is filled with a lot of fun-to-watch, exciting players who keep surprising me what they are capable of.

That said, Ray freaking Allen - wow. What a game and what a series it's been for one of my favorite players. I've always been a fan and a huge admirer of the man's talent, but the kind of bigtime, clutch play that Allen brought to the table in yesterday's game was of the kind that only a selct few - ever - have shown. And I'm thinking of the likes of Jordan, Reggie Miller, etc. Paul Pierce has had some bigtime moments as well, as has Rondo, but ultimately the Celtics are hurting with the lack of KG. Their interior defense has been soft, and guys like Derrick Rose have seemingly been able to get to the basket at will against the C's.

All I know is, it's going to be an epic Game 7 on Saturday. And while, on one hand, it would be fitting to have one more double-OT thriller, I also wouldn't really mind if the Celtics pile it on early and manage to get the decisive win. Let's go Celtics!



- I mentioned earlier that last night I went to BU's Redstone Film Fest event at Hollywood's Arclight theater. It was a fun time - I got to see a couple of interesting student films and also hear a panel on "diversification" in Hollywood, ie how to branch out into different areas, career-wise, and not get pigeonholed into one specific thing. Pretty interesting, and the panelists included people like:

Paul Michael Glaser, who was STARSKY on STARSKY AND HUTCH (!), and then went on the direct such movies as The Running Man (!!), The Cutting Edge (!), and KAZAAM (!!!!!).

Jerry Levine - married to Nina Tassler, top dog at CBS, and an actor/director who once had a supporting role on CHARLES IN CHARGE (!).

Plus, a lot of other cool people, but thought those two deserved a special mention, for obvious reasons.

Anyways, it was cool seeing a bunch of BU friends, a couple of former professors, and meeting a bunch of random alumni for what turned out to be some good networking opportunities. It's funn though, because at this point in my life I feel like I'm out of the whole "oh my god I'm so cool and work in Hollywood" phase that everyone goes through when they first move to LA. But man, with all the posturing and random schmoozing and "so what do YOU do?" conversations that go on at these events, they really do remind you of just how weird "Hollyweird" can be. Which, I guess, is good to be reminded of every so often. But if I hear anyone give an anecdote about life in "this town" or working in "this biz" anytime soon, I may have an urge to punch them.



TV STUFF:



- So how about this week's 100th episode of LOST? Personally, I thought it was a pretty spectacular episode, with a number of classic Lost moments and a sense of intensity and anticipation that made for one of the most edge-of-your-seat episodes in the series' history.

I loved the focus on Daniel Faraday. In the short time that he's been on Lost, Jeremy Davies has quickly become one of the show's most intriguing characters, and Davies brings a unique quality to the table that makes you hang on Faraday's every stammered-out word. Suffice it to say, the reveal of Faraday's tragic and twisted origins made for a stunning, mind-bending tale. There was some very clever time-loop logic at play here, and a surprising amount of information was revealed - particularly about Eloise Hawkings and her unique knowledge of the future and of the island. Of course, the big question is: why would she essentially sacrifice her own son? Is it for the greater good, the sake of the island, or just because she's an evil beyotch? We shall see, we shall see. But in the meantime, I'm sure there will be no shortage of crazy theories. Could Faraday be Jacob? Is Charles Widmore his own grandfather? Say whaaat?

In any case, this was one helluva episode of LOST. Once again, business has picked up.

My Grade: A



- Alright, time is short and I still have a lot to talk about. Check back soon for more.